The Smiling Onion

Vegetarian and Gluten-free Cooking

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Archives for February 2017

Coconut-Peanut Collards with Fried Plantains

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Collard greens are one of my absolute favorite vegetables. They do take a bit of work to prepare properly (blanching is a must, IMO) but when you do so, they have a wonderful, sweet flavor that lends itself to all sorts of spice mixes and dishes.

If you’ve ever had Ethiopian food, you’ve probably had collards sautéed with copious amounts of garlic and ginger (delicious). They are also great with cumin, cayenne, paprika — all the strong, bold spices. After they’ve been spiced like there’s no tomorrow, I like to throw in a sweet vegetable or two like carrot or sweet potato. But most importantly, they are amazing with creamy, zesty, coconut-peanut sauces like this one.

This dish is uber satisfying: warming, nourishing, and flavor-packed. The creamy, nuttiness of the collards combined with the sweet, crisp, and wonderfully starchy fried plantains is divine. It can easily be an entree or a side – if you want to make it a heartier entree, throw in some chickpeas and/or serve it with your favorite grain (though I think the plantains provide the perfect grain-free starch element). Finally, it fits the bill for all kinds of diets: gluten-free, vegan, grain-free, and Low FODMAP. If you wanted to make it Paleo, I’m pretty sure you could just use almond butter in place of peanut and you’d be all set. Yay for deliciousness that almost everyone can eat!

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Creamy Nori-Hemp Dressing (Vegan)

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Are you ready for my #1 piece of salad advice? Make your salads and dressings at home.

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve ordered a salad at a decent restaurant, only to have it arrive with a gelatinous vinaigrette that has clearly been squeezed right out of a package. This is a huge pet peeve, right up there with icy smoothies (you can read my thoughts on that and get a decidedly NON-ICY smoothie recipe here) and tofu scrambles that try to taste like egg (I think they should taste more like this). Being presented with any of these items usually has the unfortunate result of launching a 3-minute rant, which my dining partner (who may not share my opinion that the world revolves around food) has to sit through, trying – and likely failing, possibly rightly so – to fein interest or sympathy.

Another recurring problem with ordering salad in a restaurant is that the name of your chosen salad (Ex. Portobello and Mozzarella) is, far too often, actually just the name of the garnishes that will top your huge pile of $12 lettuce. Outrage!

Hence the aforementioned salad advice. In addition to saving you heartache and cash, making salad and salad dressing is one of the best ways to start flexing your creativity muscles in the kitchen. You have a built-in platform (a pile of fresh veggies – what could go wrong?) and the flexibility to combine them any way you want. Experiment with different cooking methods (I love combining raw veg with roasted), textures (crunchy pecans, creamy goat cheese…)  and flavor profiles (sweet, sour, spicy…). Elevate your salad by taking an element and transforming it in some way: Why not coat those crunchy nuts in maple syrup and cayenne and roast them in the oven first, for example, before throwing them atop your masterpiece? Finally, make an awesome dressing. Because awesome dressings have the power to transform even ordinary salads into bowls of pure glory.

This dressing, in fact, is actually best on an “ordinary” salad. (Think romaine or kale, cucumber, carrot, hard-boiled egg (if not vegan), chickpeas, etc.) Hearty farmer-style salads, in other words.  The zestiness of the roasted nori combined with the creaminess of the hemp gives the dressing a caesar or ranch-like quality that will leave you licking your fingers. But unlike caesar or ranch dressings – which aren’t generally touted for their health benefits – this one packs a nutritional punch. Hemp seeds are rich with protein, an optimal ratio of Omega-3 and 6 fatty acids, and a hefty dose of fiber. And the roasted nori adds minerals like iodine, magnesium, potassium, and selenium, to name just a few. Finally, you won’t be able to tell that this dressing is dairy-free – it’s as creamy and zesty as they come.

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Matcha Custard

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I didn’t realize until recently how fitting it would be to make custard for Valentine’s Day. Not because it’s insanely delicious (though there’s definitely that) or because you can serve it in cute little dishes (though there’s that too.) But because, to make custard properly, you really need to exhibit some of your best relationship skills.

So, in the spirit of Valentine’s Day, here are three relationship skills/lessons told through the experience of making custard. (Okay, I may have a bit of Dear Abby envy. This was way too much fun!)

Skill 1: Patience

Traditional custard is a mixture of milk and eggs, slowly thickened over a low flame. And the key word here is slow. If you get sick of waiting for it to thicken and raise the heat too high, your eggs will start to curdle, which means you’ll get chunks of cooked egg in your custard. The same thing will happen if you add the hot milk to your beaten eggs too aggressively. The trick is patience: add just a little at first; then once the egg has grown accustomed to the presence of the milk, you’ll start to drizzle in the rest. You then get to warm up the mixture – again, gradually and patiently on the stove, making sure to give it lots of love and attention (aka stirring) so nothing curdles.

Relationship Lesson:If you try to make an abrupt change without making sure your partner is on board, the relationship is likely to curdle. Best practice is to make changes and suggest improvements gradually, making sure your partner feels loved and supported (keep stirring that egg mixture!) throughout the process.

Skill 2: Trust

There is usually a point in the custard making process where I’m positive something has gone wrong. Custard sometimes takes its sweet time to thicken, and gives almost zero indication that it will thicken until it does. During those painful minutes when it looks like nothing is going to happen and I’m going to be left with a pot of liquid, remembering that I’ve been in this boat before and  always come out on top is key. Otherwise, I might be tempted to self-destructively turn up the heat or just drink the liquid then and there. I have to remember that the custard has always thickened in the end – no matter how much it looks like it won’t – and trust that this time won’t be any different.

Relationship Lesson: In a relationship built on trust, you always give your partner the benefit of the doubt. There will be times when you’ll question whether or not he/she has your back. When this happens, avoid getting worked up before you have all the information, since turning up the heat too fast could trigger exactly what you’re trying to avoid. Instead, trust your partner and give him/her time to explain before losing your cool. 

Skill 3: Experimentation

Maybe things do go awry in your custard-making process. The first time I made this matcha custard, it tasted great but had a drab, very unappealing color that just didn’t cut it. I normally outright refuse to put color in anything, but it occurred to me that maybe I could find a natural green food coloring that would work. I ended up finding this recipe, which suggested boiling spinach and then blending until completely smooth. I was a little bit nervous: Would it be too subtle? Too bright? Would it taste spinachy? (The recipe promised it wouldn’t, but I had my doubts.) Thankfully, I took the plunge, and it came out perfectly. No spinach remained after blending – it was completely liquid – and a couple tablespoons yielded the perfect muted green color. Oh, and there was no spinachy taste, whatsoever.

Relationship Lesson: It can be scary to try new things, especially if your relationship is already on the rocks. But sometimes breaking routine can be just what you need to lift you out of the doldrums and into the light. Don’t be afraid to give your relationship that little pop of color it was missing: you’ll be glad you did. 

Now that we’ve all learned soooo much, I think we deserve some custard, no?

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Savory Waffles with Caramelized Cabbage

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It took me a while to get on the waffle train. Give me a hefty stack of pancakes any day but I never got the fuss about waffles…weren’t they just like breadier pancakes, except NOT fried in butter? What was the point?

Once I got a waffle maker of my own, however, I didn’t just get on the train – I may have taken a turn in the driver’s seat! I think I made a different type of waffle every day for the first week – cornmeal, raspberry-chocolate chip … if you can think it, I probably made it. What makes them so satisfying? It’s hard to say. My waffle maker makes ginormous waffles – like seriously colossal – which definitely helps: sitting down to a gorgeous piece of bready goodness that takes up your whole plate certainly makes for a dramatic meal. Unlike pancakes, waffles also have this fantastic crispy-on-the-outside (if I let them cook a tiny bit past the “ready” light on my machine) soft-and-fluffy-on-the-inside thing going on. And one of the best things about waffles, in my humble opinion, is that you don’t have to stand by the stove frying them OR worry about making them come out the same size and shape. With a waffle, everything goes right into your handy dandy waffle maker, and they are guaranteed to come out beautifully cooked and perfectly shaped every time.

I was so waffle-happy, in fact, that I decided to create a savory waffle that wouldn’t be confined to just breakfast. Don’t get me wrong: these waffles do make a fantastic breakfast, but they are equally lovely for lunch, dinner, afternoon snack, late-night snack, you name it. They will dress up each and every occasion to put food in your mouth, period. The mix of teff, sorghum, and millet flours gives them a hefty dose of protein and whole-grain goodness as well as a wonderful flavor that I’ve spiked with thyme, herbes de provence, and parmesan: think pizza goldfish but swap out the mass production and junk food aspects with artisan bakeries and a dose of elegance and you’ll be halfway there. (I know that’s weird but you’ll see what I’m talking about when you make them!)

You can top these beauties with any number of delicious toppings, but my favorite is the caramelized cabbage in this recipe (which you should really make even if you have no intention of making waffles – it is seriously the best way to eat cabbage!) along with a poached egg. The cabbage is oh-so-buttery and sweet, delicately spiced with dill, paprika, and just a touch of allspice. And when you cut into the whole ensemble, that egg yolk will run all over your waffle and form the perfect sauce.
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