The Smiling Onion

Vegetarian and Gluten-free Cooking

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Shredded Brussels Sprouts Pizza with Goat Cheese & Olives

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One of life’s little miracles is looking in your fridge and discovering you have everything you need to make a perfect pizza. While I’m pretty down with most pizza toppings (provided they are vegetarian), there are definitely some pizza sweet spots that result from the right toppings combo. You know – like red pizza with green peppers, black olives, and spinach or spicy tomato sauce, fresh mozzarella, and basil. These tried and true topping trinities (say that 10x fast) are just so…pizzalicious.

Well, I’m adding another trinity – or actually “quintity” (not a real word, unfortunately). Shredded brussels, freshly grated parm, kalamatas, goat cheese, and parsley pesto. When I made this for the first time, my husband legit freaked out. I kind of did too. Will you? Let me know in the comments.

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Carrot Top Pesto

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Summer is in full swing and with it comes gorgeous Farmer’s Market veggies galore. This includes carrots that have not been rudely decapitated – or in other words, relieved of their feathery tops. And what a blessing that is!

Carrot tops join the ranks of underappreciated and often discarded veggie parts, along with beet greens, fennel fronds, and potato skins, among others. I’m still waiting for Chopped or some other Food Network show to do an episode that features these underutilized veggie components, all in the same round. Or maybe they have — I’m a bit behind on my Food Network binging! If they did, I hope someone made potato skin nachos with pickled beet greens, carrot top pesto, and fennel frond queso…

Anyway, back to carrot tops. Next time you find yourself with a cutting board full, please don’t throw them out. Instead, make this quick + delicious, flavor-packed pesto. You’ll be glad you did!

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Spring Carrot “Pasta” with Herbs and Hazelnuts

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Oh Spring Carrot “Pasta” with Herbs and Hazelnuts, how do I love thee. Let me count the ways:

  1. You’re ready in minutes and completely grain-free; all that beta carotene really balances my Qi.
  2. You’re beautiful and bright, with a pleasant little bite
  3. You’re elegant and delicate, mounded high on a plate; you’d cost $19 in a restaurant, but to make you’re less than $8.

Okay…Elizabeth Barrett Browning is probably turning over in her grave right now. That’s got to be some of the worst meter ever put to page! Thankfully, it doesn’t come close to describing all the merits of this recipe, which – in sharp contrast to my poetry – is actually really good. (Not that you probably trust my judgment right now…) But seriously, this is one of those shockingly simple recipes that tastes and looks far more complex than it really is. There is some (dare I say poetic?) quality that makes this entirely vegan pasta dish taste like it has oodles of butter in it – a richness, a depth, that will keep you twirling those pretty orange ribbons around your fork bite after bite. Spoiler alert: it’s definitely the hazelnuts.

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Kale Mac and Cheese (Plus a brief note about FODMAPs)

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Happy New Year everyone! I’m excited to be back from my blogging hiatus and absolutely ecstatic about this Kale Mac and Cheese. With all the craziness of the past few months (yes, I’m talking about the election and beyond) I, for one, have been craving comfort food: hearty, flavorful, cheesy goodness  to get us through the cold until the sun comes out again.

You may notice that, unlike 99.9 percent of my savory recipes, this one contains no onion or garlic (gasp!) You might also notice that that this recipe is tagged “Low FODMAP,” and if you were to check out the “By Diet” section of my blog, you’ll see that in addition to filtering recipes by vegan, dairy-free, grain-free, egg-free, etc., you can now search for recipes with this tag. So what does this all mean? And what the hell are FODMAPs?

I’ve waffled back and forth as to whether I wanted to share the reason for my blogging hiatus (Hint: it has to do with FODMAPs) and decided that I owe it to anyone who might be in a similar situation. So if you are struggling with SIBO or the Low FODMAP diet, or you just want to hear my musings on the topic, click here. I’ll explain what those terms mean, and talk a bit about my personal journey with them. For the rest of you, don’t worry: I triple promise that this Kale Mac and Cheese – and all of the recipes I share here – are NOT just intended for those on a special diet. They are packed with flavor and designed to appeal to anyone who enjoys deliciousness. In fact, many of the recipes I’ve shared here are already low FODMAP; I just hadn’t previously identified them as such.

Now let’s get to this Mac and Cheese.

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How to Cook Perfect Zucchini

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Zucchini can be hard to get just right. It often cooks unevenly no matter how evenly you cut it – some pieces will start to get translucent while others are still closer to raw. And it can go from undercooked to overcooked in a matter of minutes; in fact, even if you manage to cook it perfectly, it  has a nasty habit of overcooking itself with residual heat after you take it out of the pan. To be clear, if you know your way around the kitchen at all, you are unlikely to overcook zucchini to the point where it’s unpleasant to consume; however, it’s quite easy for the flesh to end up more translucent than white all the way through, and in my book, that’s just a tad too far.

Why? Because when you hit that perfect zucchini doneness, it’s almost like a different vegetable all together. Tender yet crunchy, with a mild, creamy flavor – it has none of that unpleasant (can I call it squeaky?) texture that zucchini haters always cite when asked how they could dislike such a common vegetable.

So how do you do it? Three simple steps.

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Lemony Chive and Spinach Pesto (Vegan/Dairy-Free Option)

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Sometimes you gotta change it up a bit. Basil pesto is great – no argument here. But we’ve now reached the part of summer where it is HOT. And that means I need something a bit zingier – something with more freshness, more brightness. Because I’m sure as hell not going to find that in the swampland that is NYC right now.

Are you with me? Good. You should be. Because this pesto is yumtastic. Or yumtacular. Or whatever your favorite made-up compound superlative conveying deliciousness happens to be. Bright and grassy, it has a complexity of flavor that you don’t often get with a standard pesto, where everything hits you all at once. Taste  a spoonful of this, and your first impression will be fresh, lemony, and zingy – then the flavor will begin to evolve, giving way to something much fuller, richer, and creamier. If you are used to using raw garlic in your pestos, you’ll notice that the sautéed chives lend a flavor that is deeper, subtler, less abrasive, and more complex. Those delicious chives will begin to strut their stuff, and you’ll marvel at how such a small stalk  – when given the proper treatment – can bloom and blossom into a full-on umami symphony.

Or  – since not everyone is as food-obsessed as I am (you guys, I just typed the phrase “umami symphony”), you’ll just be like: “Mmm, this is yummy. I should put it on pasta.”

And indeed you should.

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Mascarpone and Berry Parfait with Balsamic, Basil, and Mint (4th of July, Here We Come!)

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My brother and I have always been very attached to traditions. Most people have to do something at least twice for it to be considered a “tradition” that should be repeated; for us, it only takes once. As soon as we do something to commemorate a special occasion or event, if it goes well, it’s a tradition. And we better repeat it, or face the consequences!

My parents were frequently frustrated with us growing up – “But mom, we can’t celebrate Rosh Hashanah on the day itself – we ALWAYS celebrate it one day early!” – or “Dad, we HAVE to go to the store right now and get chocolate covered espresso beans to put in the cookies – it’s a tradition!” I’ve cut vacations short just so that I could be home for a certain occasion I’m always home for and I once took a “birthday walk” in the pouring rain (complete with thunder and lightening) because … well… it was the birthday walk. Tradition! You can’t mess with it.

Anyway, I have two 4th of July traditions that I try to repeat every year. I’m not going to tell you about the first one, because it will probably make me sound even crazier than I already do. But I will tell you about the second: vanilla ice-cream with strawberries, raspberries, and blueberries. Red-white-and-blue deliciousness.

So, for my 4th of July blog post, I wanted to create something in the spirit of that tradition. I definitely did not want to make ice-cream this week (I’m a little ice-creamed out from the Ben and Jerry’s fiasco I wrote about last week) but berries and cream … this I could do. And boy could I eat it! Because this parfait is a mascarpone cream interspersed with balsamic-basil strawberries, blueberries infused with mint and red wine, and salted-maple raspberries. Need I say more? At the risk of sounding super cheesy, it’s fireworks in your mouth.

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16 Passover Recipes

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Passover is around the corner! That means matzoh ball soup, charoset, hard boiled eggs, horseradish, tzimmes, and a whole lot of other Passover staples if you happen to be attending or hosting a seder this year. In fact, planning what to eat at a seder is almost never difficult – there are so many traditional Passover dishes! What can be hard for most of us, however, is figuring out what to eat after the Seder, when you are sick of the staples yet still have almost a week left of restricted eating.

Since I’m gluten-free year round and happen to also follow Sephardic Passover (this means beans and grains are A-okay), the basic change to my diet is restricting oats. Which isn’t super difficult. However, many of my friends follow Ashkenazi Passover, which is much more restrictive – no grains or legumes at all (though quinoa is okay), no poppy seeds, sunflower seeds, or sesame seeds…the list goes on for a while. And it can be difficult if you are vegetarian.

So, instead of giving you yet another version of Matzoh Ball Soup (though I have a pretty great idea for one and will probably post it next year), I’ve decided to list for you all of the delicious and wonderful things you can eat right from this blog even if you follow a strict Ashkenazi style Pesach. (If you follow Sephardic Passover, you can pretty much eat anything on this blog that doesn’t contain oats!)

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Mini Portobello Pizzas (Grain-Free!)

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About a week ago, I was in the middle of some mundane task that I’m failing to remember at the moment, when I suddenly had a vision: portobello pizza. I don’t mean pizza topped with portobellos; that, while very tasty, is hardly worthy of being called a stroke of inspiration. No, I mean pizzas made out of portobellos. “Think about it,” I told Bobby (my fiancé.) “They’re round, would hold toppings well, go with pizza-like flavors, and are way more flavorful than most pizza crusts, both gluten-free and gluten-laden.” Bobby was skeptical. “Would it really feel like pizza if there was no bread component?” I was adamant that it would.

A week later, I tested my theory. And I’m happy to say I was absolutely right. (As I am about most things we disagree on — just kidding, just kidding.) In any case, when I presented him with the finished product, Bobby was  sold. “This should be a thing,” he said. “They should do this in restaurants.”

Indeed, they should. And possibly it’s already a thing – I haven’t Googled it yet. But I’m pretty sure someone must have come up with the same idea at some point because it’s such a perfect pizza option: it’s grain-free, super easy, doesn’t require you to make any type of crust, and also happens to hit that comfort-food note that you expect from a good pizza. And — for my dairy-free people — portobellos are insanely juicy and flavorful, so even if you make your pizzas without cheese, you’ll still get the satisfaction of that gooey, drippy, messy pizza heaven that everyone deserves to experience once in a while.

On that note, authenticity was definitely not my goal when I created these, but they are authentic in one major way: it’s easiest to eat these with a knife and fork. And that’s how they eat their pizza in Italy, baby! If you are lucky enough to have leftovers and they cool down to room temperature, then you can pick ’em up. It may be a tad messy, but in the gooey, drippy, pizza-heaven way I mentioned earlier.

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Vegan Caesar Salad Dressing (Soy-Free and Nut-Free!)

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I’ve always been a caesar salad coveter. At restaurants, potlucks, cafeterias … I’ve often caught myself ogling that pile of romaine with the luscious, creamy dressing and fantasizing about bite after bite of delicious, crispy, creamy, sinful goodness.  I was devastated the first time I learned that, while there was no visible meat to speak of, the dressing harbored what I considered to be a dark secret: anchovies.

Mind you, I was well aware of most foods that had hidden meat – beef stock in French onion soup, chicken stock in so many classic veggie soups, lard in Mexican beans – and I was never that enraged by any of it. The hidden meat was enough to keep me far away, but that was fine with me; there was no coveting – no looking longingly at a neighboring table’s order and imagining what it would be like to eat it.

With caesar salad, however, I’ve embarrassed myself more than once. There is something about it that is just so tantalizing. So when vegan caesar dressings started popping up in some vegetarian restaurants, I was super excited. Until I went rice-free, that is. Because guess what all vegan caesar salad dressings (that I’ve ever seen) have in common? Miso! And guess what miso is made from? Soy and rice.

So I decided to create a vegan caesar-style dressing that is soy-free, nut-free, and grain-free. It uses sunflower seeds as a base, and is caesared-up with roasted seaweed sheets (the ones that come in the little seaweed snack packages) and umeboshi vinegar. It is very easy to make, requires zero planning (you don’t have to soak the seeds or anything), and has a creamy, salty, savory, tangy flavor that should work for all your caesar salad needs. I’ve tried it massaged into kale, on romaine, and as a dip for carrot sticks. While you won’t taste anchovies, you will get that creamy texture and savory flavor that (in my opinion) is the defining feature of a caesar dressing.

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